"The Kindness and Faithfulness of the Lord" or "God's sense of humor"

The love how when God says He will do something and then when it seems like my little world is going to fall apart and no one can save me He comes through and does the very thing He promised!

"With a freewill offering I will sacrifice to You;
I will give thanks to Your name,
O Lord, for it is good.
For He has delivered me from every trouble,
And my eyes have looked in triumph
Over my enemies."
Psalm 54:6-7 (ESV)

Life as a missionary is not easy. Not getting a paycheck every two weeks and relying on the commitment of your supporters and the kindness of the Lord does a number to your faith and your sanity. But that is the one thing that God says to test Him in.

"Bring the full tithes into the storehouse,
that there may be food in My house.
And thereby put me to the test, says the Lord of Host,
If I will not open the windows of heaven for you
And pour down for you a blessing until
There is no more need."
Malachi 3:10 (ESV)

Every month it never fails when I get down to paying bills I start to panic when I look at my balance and compare that with my amount due and realize the latter is normally quite larger. So every month it never fails that I question my calling as a Christian and wonder if I should still be here. There are so many more places that i can make much more money then I am making here (Which on paper is closer to nothing then anything else) But every month it never fails that the month passes and I look at my bank account and wonder how I payed for rent, utilities, food, and a cup of coffee and still have money leftover. It doesn't make sense. I have been doing this for over a year now and it is the same story every month. I love the ignorance of man and the richness and humor of the Lord.

I think it is His way of telling me to just trust in Him and that I am where I need to be because it is only by Him that I am still here. He loves to mess with my mind. :-)

.:sean

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